Other wise known as the philosophy gleaned from within the ebb and flow of society itself. My own little gift to the universe.
Sometimes I find myself wondering what life would be like if more people could see through my eyes. Of course, I do believe
anyone ever plagued by the prospect of never quite being the thing has at some point or another wished fervently that the myths
were all real, and magick in whatever form was possible, and in the end could just make others understand. Well, I'm no stranger to
such fallibilities.
Of course, I have never denied the existence of anything, yet in the same regard I have little time to confirm such
existences as well. So we come to the fencepost aspect of living. There are many fence posts out there,
those that divide parking lots and backyards, even those that herd people like cattle through amusement park lines. The question is,
what is the fencepost. I'm what I prefer to call a fencepost walker, always threading the line between divisions. Though my divisions
often when compared seem rather contradictory, in their own realms they make sense. I can still recall the first fencepost I walked,
which tragically happened to be between my mother and father. With two sisters, one who chose sides, and another who really didn't have
a choice, I was begotten with a rather horrendous situation that many face, to try choosing whom I loved best. Of course, it was
never phrased that way, or even to some deluded mindset of reality set up to be such a choice. Yet, that's what it felt like.
So, I began treading the line. The first time I only had myself for complete council, I couldn't make a decision. Time
went by, and I suddenly began to realize that I had made a choice.
"You can choose a ready guide in some celestial voice. If you choose not to decide you still have made a choice. You can choose from
phantom fears and kindness that can kill; I will choose a path's that's clear, I will choose freewill."
--Rush, "Freewill"
This passage changed my life. I heard it one day on the radio, had no clue who was singing, or who had wrote it. It just
filled me to the brim. Mostly with a feeling of, "That's a really cool line," but secondly with a feeling of dread and
"Whoops." I had abstained from choosing for so long, that I didn't realize that I had made a choice that was better than options
I had previously felt available. Now abstenance is a valid choice when it is taken into consideration. The focus of the song lyric, I
do believe was meant to remind us to realize that we can't use abstension as an excuse. Consciously or unconsciously the choice is made,
and thus we must uphold that decision.
Well the fencepost continued to this day. I walk the line between definitive Left and Right, Good and Evil, and especially
Fantasy and Reality. As a whole, that is not thinking of the individual mind, but as humanity as one conglomerate, we all tend to believe
reality to be static. If that were true, where do dreams come from, or faith, or love? These are intangibles that aren't "Real"
yet we believe to be. Thinking this way is often a good method to getting one's self committed, or without any friends who are devoted
to such topics. I just tend to ask the question what the fuck is real? Mostly because I don't know. Pursuing knowledge,
as I tend to dedicate my every waking hour to, involves all sorts of knowledge to pursue. The thought that Cogito ergo sum is my only
definitive proof of existence seems rather empty.
As with everything thus described by The Way of the Leaf, catholic seems to be the best word. Forgive me my mild ironic humor.
Yes, catholic, or universal, everything. In order to find the fencepost, one must know where the division lies between realms, thus
one must learn about the realms. As one could guess, with my limited feeble human mind, I go through countless bouts of depression
regarding my own inferiority attempting such a conquest. Knowing everything about everything. Well, shit, at least I didn't desire to
have money and power with that as well. Cheezygrin. Anyway, the point behind it all is simply understood with the recognition that
the whole of humanity is research ground for the spiritual. Thus society itself and all of its creations are tools, windows, or books that
can guide one to understanding the warp and woof of the universe. Or at least our own pathetic meager lives.
Yes even my life is pathetic. As humans we want more than anything else we've ever encountered, and it is that simple aspect
of want, or desire that presses us onward. Progressing technologically as society would have us for the moment, but who's to say what
progressive direction we'll take next. Suffice it to say, this same want often causes us to see things that aren't really there. What
is that? Supplanting our own visions upon any topic matter. Well, I think I'm going to be giving a complete rundown here of not only how
it is possible, but how it happens to all of us.